Monday, December 6, 2010

Dear Tye,

Today your class went to Ameritowne and it was so much fun. I am so grateful that your dad works so hard and allows me the luxury to be able to volunteer in your class. When you woke up this morning you were so excited for Ameritowne. You couldn't quit talking about it. You made me smile and I mean the type of smile that your entire body feels from the inside out. You ran for the judge and won the election. You gave such a great speech. You left me and your teachers stunned. We are all so used to seeing you quiet and withdrawn. They couldn't believe how hard you worked and how well you did when you spoke in front of everyone. Don't get me wrong you were nervous, but nobody would have know that. It is so great to see you coming out of your shell. Today when you were wearing your robe and had to speak in front of everyone to read the oath, I was teary eyed (imagine that, me). You looked so confident. Everyone said how handsome and comfortable you looked. I am so proud of you Tye. You are such a hard worker. I can't believe that you are almost out of elementary school. Time is going by way too fast. It seems like just yesterday you were lining up in kindergarten with your "buzz" cut and spiderman t-shirt. Now you are 12 years old and such an amazing young man. I thouroughly enjoyed myself today. I never did stuff like this when I was in school so getting to see it through your eyes is exciting for me. I hope you continue to face these great experiences with the determination and ability to never get up. Thank you so much for allowing me to share in these great experiences with you. I hope you have more "aha" moments than you will ever be able to remember.

I love you with all my heart!

Love,
Mom

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Abundance

So my Aunt Linda gave me this crystal that is supposed to be lucky or something and if you place it in a certain corner of your home, good things will happen to you in abundance. While I have had it since Saturday and I am not sure if it is in the wrong corner or what but some weird things have been happening. First, I have had horrible diarrhea and I mean horrible to the point where I can't be too far from the bathroom. Is this what is meant by abundance? Then my computer went got all messed up and had not 1 not 2 but 17 viruses in just a few minutes. Hmm abundance?? Yesterday I had 5 people cancel on volunteering at the school's Holiday Gift Shop next week. The calls all came in a row. I know this sounds silly to be worried about but the shop only works if we have enough volunteers. I have been doing this for years and it is the first time that more than 1 volunteer cancelled.
Finally, today I went on a field trip with Luke's class to Addenbrooke park. It is a really neat idea. They go once a month to observe nature and the changes that different seasons make. Well, first it was weird we get there and there are hundreds of geese everywhere. We go to this park a lot and I have never seen so many geese. It was odd. While with that many geese comes...yep you guessed it lots of droppings, I mean everywhere. So one of the little darlings in my group was walking on the rocks and slipped and fell into the cold pond. Did I say that it is December 2nd. Very cold. No worries, he is fine, just a little wet and cold. While I was trying to get him out I slipped on the "abundant" amount of goose droppings and fell down. I was wet and dirty and cold too. I had goose poop everywhere, in my hair in my ears all over my clothes. It was nuts. You would have thought I rolled around in it, which I guess basically is what it looked like I did. Well, needless to say the kids's parents, teacher, and principal were not happy about this. My take, it was an accident, but he is fine. There take, it could be a potential lawsuit. His take, his new shoes are ruined. Luke's take, worried his mom will never be able to go on a field trip again.
So lots of weird things with this abundance crystal. I think I placed it in the wrong area. I am going to move it tomorrow and await the wonderful things that happen to me in abundance!

Friday, November 26, 2010

Thanksgiving Fun

Dear Grandma Ruthie,

Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays. Growing up some of my best memories are of preparing the entire week before to get ready for the holiday. I remember tearing bread with you for the stuffing so it could set out for a couple of days. You thought it made it taste better that way. I remember rolling out dough for the pie crusts and singing songs while we did it. I remember waking up in the morning to the aroma of turkey in the oven. YUM! I still love that smell! There is nothing like it. My mom has 7 siblings and with all of the aunts and uncles and cousins and grandparents, we would have a huge feast. I used to brag to all of my friends because it was the 1 thing I had that none of my friends did, a huge, close extended family. I used to count the days down to the holidays and would be so excited when everyone arrived at your house. I would also get sad when the last people left for the night. I spent a lot of time with you because mom worked as a waitress nights and went to school during the day.
When I was a senior in high school I remember being even more excited than ever for T-Day. I knew I was going out of state for college the following year so I looked at this as my last T-Day before leaving home. I knew it was going to be especially memorable, which it was but for different reasons. I ended up getting horribly sick the night before. I was in so much pain, my mom had to take me to the ER. They ran all kinds of tests and finally determined I had a deeply seeded kidney infection. This was before they did cat scans to detect stones so it was much more difficult to find them. Plus since I was only 17 I didn't meet the criteria. So I spent the day drugged up and enviously eyeing everyone's plate since I was too queasy to eat. That night I laid next to you and you had the softest hands, they were almost like silk. You ran your hands through my long hair and was trying to get me to relax since I still felt quite ill. For those of you who have had kidney stones, you know what kind of pain I am talking about. It is close to the child birth sensation. For those of you have never experienced it, hopefully you won't. It is horrible. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. So anyway as we snuggled together while you told me stories of growing up on a farm in Nebraska. I never tired of these stories. You told me how they used to can their food and they would raise a turkey for a year with the intention of killing it on T-Day. Every year your dad and brother would go behind the barn to kill their turkey a few days before Thanksgiving. Every year they couldn't do it. My great grandfather would end up driving into town to buy a store bought turkey. You had many siblings and by the time you were 12 you each had a pet turkey because they were unable to kill them at Thanksgiving. I don't know why but I loved that story. Then you told me that no matter what happened in my life to always remember the little things. Always remember the smell of apples baking in the oven (another great smell). You told me to be thankful of everything, even the hard stuff. Because the more thankful we are during tough times the more we will appreciate the good that comes our way.
You died when I was 21 and for a few years everyone still got together, but it slowly started tricking down. Everyone began spending the holidays with their immediate families. I was so young and into my college years it didn't really bother me. It honestly didn't get to me until my oldest son was 2 years old. I wanted Tye to experience that great, wonderful feasts that I so looked forward too and loved as a child. More than anything I wish Tye, Luke, and Alyncia could know you. Some years we had bigger dinners than others, but they were never as big as they were when I was growing up.
This year with the help of aunt Linda we decided to have a big feast and invite everyone. We have had a tough year. Mom's oldest brother, Clay passed away and it made everyone think that it could have been them or me. So we were all excited to get together. Plus with my step dad having cancer and surviving despite the odds we had a lot to be thankful for. So we began planning. It always starts with a list, thats what you taught me. Alyncia was so excited. She helped me make lists, plan, make endless trips to the store, clean messes, all of it, we had so much fun. She even ate a piece of my burnt pie. She didn't even crinkle her nose at the taste and believe me it wasn't too good. It only took 3 tries to get it right. I did not inherit your amazing cooking and baking skills. At first everyone said they were coming. We were going to have 29 adults and 14 children. My husband was a bit worried how everyone would fit in our house. I wasn't worried at all. I told him my best memories were of all of us cramped in your kitchen while the TV blared in the living room with football on. Everyone grasping for the last roll or piece of pumpkin pie. It truly was a magical time. As it got closer to the Holiday we had a few people back out. Jim & Kim decided to go to Durango to be with her mom since her dad just passed that year they didn't want her to be alone. Dave had to work so Vikki decided to stay at home and get together with friends. Dwight was too sick to come and so on.. I was pretty upset and Luke seeing how upset I was thought it was all because I spent so much time cooking and now there would be too much food. He said mom I am glad they are not coming now there will be more food for me. I told him it wasn't about the food and I explained to him how special the holiday was to me and how I wanted them to experience that at least once. He paused for a moment and reflected on what I said. He said mom it sounds ok but if all those people came you would be so busy you wouldn't have as much time for us and I would miss you. Luke always knows what to say to make someone feel better. I gave him a big hug and told him not only do I always have time for him, but I will always make time for him too. Then he grinned, his big toothless grin and said now do I get a whole pie for myself? Only Luke, he loves food.
We ended up having a great holiday. It wasn't what I anticipated, but I have found life seldom is what we plan. After dinner and cleaning up we went over to my parent's house to visit Dwight (my step-dad, kids grandpa). He just got out of the hospital 4 days before and wasn't up being around a bunch of people or watching everyone eat when he cannot. He was still on a liquid diet. We ended up hanging out for a couple of hours and watching movies. We were all tired and hot. Since the chemo he gets really cold and so he keeps their house at 80 degrees. Despite us all sweating and being tired, nobody complained. The kids could see how much it meant to grandpa for us to be there with him. They never once asked can we go. When it was time to leave Alyncia went to give grandpa a hug and he pushed her away, he was cut open in his stomach and has thirty some staples in his back from them taking out the cancer and he was worried a hug would hurt him. My mom felt bad and apologized to Alyncia. Now my 6 year old daughter never ceases to amaze me. Without missing a beat she says that is ok grandpa I have enough love for us that our hugs don't have to touch we can feel the love long distant. We all got teary eyed. She is so innocent and pure. Grandpa said well than we are good because I love you that much too.
When we got home that night I was laying next to Alyncia caressing her face and playing with her hair as my grandma used to do to me. It is amazing to me how things manage to go full circle. Without even realizing it I felt the my cheeks getting wet with tears. I miss you so much grandma. I hope you know what an extraordinary influence you had on my life. All the love I have and give is because of what you taught me. And now even when I think the pain is unbearable because I miss you so much I think of what my darling daughter said and I know I have enough love to go the distance. I now know why it is that Alyncia's middle name is named after you. So grandma wherever you are this hug is for you. Happy Thanksgiving! I love you and I miss you with all my heart!

Love,
April Elaine

Monday, November 15, 2010

Dear Luke,

You are amazing! You had your first basketball tournament with your new competitive team this weekend and you guys won the championship! Your team went undefeated. You played absolutely amazing! I can't believe how far you have come in a year. I am sure a lot of it has to do with that you are so happy with your dad and uncle Travis as your coaches. I can't believe how hard you played. In the last game I could see how tired you were and when you got slammed into the floor and hurt your arm I thought for sure you were out. I was wrong! You are a lot tougher than we give you credit for. I know it had to hurt (the swelling and bruising alone are evidence). Yet, you said you couldn't let your team down.
I think what I am most proud of (don't get me wrong you know how competitive I am). I love to win. You enjoyed the limelight for exactly 2 minutes than you came up and whispered, "Do you think Tye's team will win?" You could have, you should have enjoyed your moment Luke, you earned it. Yet, your brother had another game to play to even make it to the championship and you were concerned about him. We all kept telling you how great you were and your team was and you kept bringing up Tye and how good he is, and do you think he will win? So Luke while this letter seemed like it was going to be about playing 4 great games in a weekend, it is more about your great character. You are not the center of attention a whole lot, and when you are what do you do, you turn the tables and show what a great heart you have by worrying about your brother. So, Luke the real reason why you are so amazing, (beside your athletic ability) is your ability to read other people, and know when they are hurt, happy, upset or just need a little boost. Your huge heart and sensitivity to others will never cease to amaze me Luke. I am honored and privileged to be your mother. Thank You for allowing me to share such an wonderful moment with you. So Tye's team didn't win the championship. Tye played great, probably better than ever but they came up a little short. You wouldn't let us bring up your winning at all the entire night. When I asked you if you wanted to wear your championship shirt to school, I could tell you did.. you hesitated and said nah its alright I don't want Tye to feel sad. Luke, that is great that you are so caring toward your brother, but you know what it is ok to focus on yourself once in a while (I know you will rarely do this in your life). It would make me so happy to see you do that. You are an amazing young person Luke. I only hope everyone around you realizes how we are all better for knowing you.

I love you with all my heart and then some!

Love,
Mom

Friday, November 12, 2010

Dear Tye,

I received a letter from your teacher today. It said, "what an amazing student you are.. and how excited she is to watch you learn." Not only are you an amazing student, you are an amazing young man. I find it remarkable how hard you work at everything: basketball, soccer, school, and yes even those dreaded video games. My biggest worry for you is that you are your own worst critic. You are so hard on yourself. Ease up a bit Tye. Don't spend so much time worrying about the end result that you forget to enjoy the process. You have always been very shy and reserved. The past few months you have become more confident and self assured. I know you will do great things in your life. You will not settle for anything less. Thank you for bringing me so much joy and happiness. These past 12 years have gone way too fast. I love you more than you will ever know.

Love always,
Mom

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Snow is finally here. I love the cold weather. We played hookie from school today and watched Toy Story. It is such a great movie! Luke & Alyncia had already seen it with my mom but it was the first time for Tye and me. We were both teary eyed at the end. I love it that my tough 12 year old has a sensitive side to him. Tye is not one to open up and share his feelings very often. So when he does I treasure it. We are going to an informational meeting at Creighton Middle School tonight. Tye is not thrilled. He needs to decide if he wants to go there or be home schooled next year. I am ok with whatever choice he makes. I worry about middle school cause of all the horror stories I have heard, but home school would be a lot of work on the both of us.
Basketball starts this weekend and we are so excited! Both boys are in a tournament. Should be lots of fun! Tye Sr. and his brother Travis are coaching both teams. They are such wonderful coaches. We are so lucky to have Travis.
Alyncia is starting Girl Scouts and she is so excited. She came home with the flyer that she completely read and she said I am in. It sounds like a lot of fun: horseback riding, camping, earning badges. She can't wait! I am excited to have something that just the 2 of us can do together. My mom was my troop leader and we had so much fun. I am not going to be the leader, too much going on with sports, PTA, and school, but I will help out.

What I know for sure: I know it is the little things that matter. Precious moments: cuddling with Alyncia this morning, tickling Luke until he laughed and made me giggle too, crying at Toy Story with Tye.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

It has been a weird Fall Season. I am very worried about my step dad. He is having surgery next week. I pray it will all go ok. On a more positive note. Tye came home from school in a great mood. He has the most amazing teacher this year and I am so proud of how well he is doing in school. I can't believe he is in 6th grade. It is all going way too fast. Luke had a great soccer season. He has so much more confidence and his level of play has improved. He is loving it! It is tough to remember that is what it should be about. Alyncia's friend came over last week and told us, "Alyncia is the boss of kindergarten." We weren't exactly shocked, she is rather bossy. Her response, "not everyday." She just cracks us up. Last night she and her dad were playing Candyland. It was precious. She won of course! What I am certain of today, I love many people and I am loved!